Published: 7 November 2023 (print)/7 November 2023 (audio) ![]()
Publisher: Margaret K. McElderry Books/Spotify Audio
Pages: 229/10 hrs and 37 mins
Narrator: Jordan Fisher and Rebekkah Ross
Format: Audiobook
Genre: Contemporary Young Adult
★ ★ ★ – 3 Stars
Eden and Josh never had a fair shot at a healthy relationship. When they dated in high school, they each had their own problems getting in the way of the deep connection they felt toward one another. Unbeknownst to Josh, Eden was carrying the burden of a devastating sexual assault, while Josh was dealing with his own private struggle of having an alcoholic father.
Months after Eden and two other girls publicly accuse their rapist, Eden is starting college while her case goes to trial. Now when she and Josh reconnect, it seems like it might finally be in the right place at the right time for them to make it work. But is their love strong enough to withstand the challenges and chaos of college and the crushing realities of a trial that will determine whether Eden gets the justice she deserves?
It took me a year to read this after having read the first book in the duology. While I had conflicting feelings over the first story, having read the second made me remember the key moments of the first book and fade away what I found to be boring. I think the driving part of this was the Eden/Josh relationship. That was the better part of the first book and while I immensely respect the story Smith told the first time around, I liked this one better.
There really was something about Smith’s writing in the first book that kept me thinking about trying the sequel. I would see it there and keep it on my saved list to get to when I had a chance around other books I wanted to read. I was connected to Eden and Josh and if that was the pull of the sequel then that’s what got me to finally pick it up.
I really like the Eden/Josh relationship. They are good together, work through their issues together, and have a good communication style. It’s interesting how fond I feel for these characters, especially when I gave book one 2.5 stars, but the dynamic and honesty between the pair, the emotional connection, really grabs you. Maybe not intensely or dramatically, but it hooks on and doesn’t let go.
The story itself is good. We’ve been with Eden for three years and now she is at university and trying again with Josh, the right way round this time, dates and all. The characters we’ve met in book one are back. He mother is different, her father is worse, and her brother is more supportive and in her corner which I loved. The friends she has have also had their own experiences which change them and mixing all of these together brings its own challenges.
The story is nowhere near as dark or intense as the first, more reflective, less emotional (but not emotionless), and full of hope. There is intrigue and a compelling story right away so it keeps you engaged. You are enamoured by these people and want to see where their story goes. Having the history of book one behind you Smith doesn’t need to give us a huge reintroduction into any of these people because we know them already, the only difference is seeing how they’ve evolved.
The storyline from book one continues and we see the consequences from Eden’s action of outing her rapist which was great. Her bravery and the challenges she faced are played out and it was good to see the “after” moment of the big reveals and challenges that characters often make.
Aside from the court case in the background, this is a very character driven story as Josh and Eden find their place and work out their lives together. Their affection for one another never feels saccharine or unrealistic, it’s solid, especially given the risk and the dangers they started out with.
I was sceptical going in, but Smith does a great job finishing the story that began so dark and traumatic, moving it into a lighter more hopeful space. There is still the ongoing consequences of the first book which was a realism I appreciated. There are no perfect fixes, Eden isn’t magically healed, Josh isn’t always perfect, and the stresses of life and emotional tolls cause conflict.
I’m curious as to whether there will be a third. I don’t think it needs it, I think Smith finishes the story in a perfect place that is open and up to the reader. Especially given how it ends I think picking a solid conclusion would be risky. But if a third one came along I would no doubt be intrigued enough to see where it went.
You can purchase The Way I am Now via the following
Wordery | Blackwell’s | Angus & Robertson
Fishpond | Amazon | Amazon Aust | Audible

Will Tavares is the dream summer fling – he’s fun, affectionate, kind – but just when Ollie thinks he’s found his happily ever after, summer vacation ends and Will stops texting Ollie back. Now Ollie is one prince short of his fairy-tale ending, and to complicate the fairy tale further, a family emergency sees Ollie uprooted and enrolled at a new school across the country. Which he minds a little less when he realizes it’s the same school Will goes to…except Ollie finds that the sweet, comfortably queer guy he knew from summer isn’t the same one attending Collinswood High. This Will is a class clown, closeted – and, to be honest, a bit of a jerk.
In this elegant dual narrative, Essie is a thirteen-year-old girl feeling glum about starting a new school after her professor dad takes a temporary teaching position in a different town. She has 110 days here and can’t wait for them to end. Then she meets Ollie: delicate, blue eyes, short hair, easy smile. At first, Essie thinks she has a typical crush on a beautiful boy. But as her crush blossoms, she soon realizes that Ollie is not a boy or a girl, but gender non-binary.
Chloe Green is so close to winning. After her mums moved her from SoCal to Alabama for high school, she’s spent the past four years dodging gossipy classmates and a puritanical administration at Willowgrove Christian Academy. The thing that’s kept her going: winning valedictorian. Her only rival: prom queen Shara Wheeler, the principal’s perfect progeny.
When Aidan was born, everyone thought he was a girl. His parents gave him a pretty name, his room looked like a girl’s room, and he wore clothes that other girls liked wearing. After he realised he was a trans boy, Aidan and his parents fixed the parts of life that didn’t fit anymore, and he settled happily into his new life. Then Mum and Dad announce that they’re going to have another baby, and Aidan wants to do everything he can to make things right for his new sibling from the beginning–from choosing the perfect name to creating a beautiful room to picking out the cutest onesie. But what does “making things right” actually mean? And what happens if he messes up? With a little help, Aidan comes to understand that mistakes can be fixed with honesty and communication, and that he already knows the most important thing about being a big brother: how to love with his whole self.








