fantasy | Lost in a Good Book

Artemis Fowl and The Arctic Incident (#2) by Eoin Colfer

03 Apr 2013 Leave a comment

by Amy in 4 Stars, Artemis Fowl Series, Junior Fiction, Young Adult Tags: artemis fowl, eoin colfer, fantasy, four stars, junior fiction, young adult

Published: May 6 2002
Publisher: Puffin Books
Pages: 288
Format: Book
Genre: Junior Fiction/Young Adult Fantasy
★ ★ ★ ★ – 4 Stars

Someone has been supplying Class A illegal human power sources to the goblins. Captain Holly Short of the LEPrecon Unit is sure that the person responsible is her arch-enemy, thirteen-year-old Artemis Fowl. But is he? Artemis has his own problems to deal with: his father is being held to ransom and only a miracle will save him. Maybe this time a brilliant plan just won’t be enough. Maybe this time Artemis needs help…

After Artemis’ attempts to restore his family fortunes using ransom and blackmail, his focus shifts to finding his father. Held up in a prominent boarding school Artemis, now thirteen, devises a plan to escape and track down his missing father. Using the skill and sly wit we’ve come to know and love from Artemis he is soon on his way to rescuing his father with Butler ever present at his side.

In a different style to that of the previous book, Artemis has no interest in tracking down the People, however this does not mean they are not looking at him. There is something suspicious going on underground and with the events of the past still present in the LEP’s memory, the finger is pointed in Artemis’ direction. This suspicion brings Holly and Artemis together once more as she intercepts his travels and for the first time takes him down into her world where it is soon revealed that there is something a lot bigger and sinister going on than they first thought.

One of the things I really enjoyed in this story was that the underground world of the People was explored to a greater extent, and not just as a connection to Artemis’ story. As a civilization and a race Colfer weaves this wonderful image of their world and how it operates. We are invited into their world starting with the greater picture, we see their laws and issues, and their daily routines, and we get to see how they live as a society. With this extensive look and separate storyline we are also introduced to new characters such as the pixie Opal Koboi, more goblins and a sinister Frenchmen to name just a few. It is not all new faces however, with plenty of familiar faces both above and below ground; dwarf criminal Mulch Diggums, technology whiz centaur Foaly, and LEP Commander Root return with Holly, as do a few others, each with the humour, quirks, and unique personality that we grew fond of the first time around.

As these two worlds overlap to help each other solve their own mysteries, they do so with a growing trust and a cautious but more cooperative and friendly partnership than they had in the past. As much as I liked the humour and interactions between characters in the first book, I do think when both sides are cooperating and being friendlier it makes for very different comments, wit, and interactions; not necessarily better, but different. Either way it is really unfair to compare them side by side, they are a progression of a story rather than separate works really, both were really enjoyable reads. The great thing I’ve found about Colfer’s writing is you can enjoy reading about Artemis’ world on its own, you can enjoy reading about the People’s world on its own, and some how it still manages to get a little bit greater and more enjoyable when the two worlds collide, no matter whether it is friendly or not.

What I like most about these books, it isn’t just the wit and the irrepressible charm these characters have in their own individual way, and as much as I adore the writing style Colfer has, what I love most in these books is mainly Artemis. There is something about that boy that makes you love and be in awe of this kid and how he logically thinks things through, plans everything and knows everything that needs to be known at the time. Though we do get to see a new aspect of Artemis in this book, it is great watching him squirm ever so slightly in an environment he is not used to. He begins to grow as a person and we see this as he shows a more moral side, and he becomes less of an evil schemer as others take the reign; this works especially well since most of the action involved in this book is based around the LEP world. He has not changed completely mind you, there are some classic Artemis moments when he is in his element, but seeing the new side was a treat.

There are twists and turns as always in Colfer’s narrative and we get to see action from everyone’s point of view which is always a great thing. Colfer does not just switch between characters as the story progresses, he lets us experience the same event from everyone involved. This is a brilliant choice because each character offers so much, and is so complex in their own right that usually any time anything is happening it is the work of every one throwing something into it. Artemis’ brilliance and cunning excelled in this book. As I say, you get to see a different side of him, but not so much you can forget the calm, calculated thirteen year old who is so meticulous no matter what his circumstances. I do hope he stays this way through the remaining series. A brilliant read, as funny, action filled and cleverly created as the first, and it is certainly a great stepping stone into book number three.

Artemis Fowl (#1) by Eoin Colfer

01 Apr 2013 Leave a comment

by Amy in 4 Stars, Artemis Fowl Series, Junior Fiction, Young Adult Tags: artemis fowl, eoin colfer, fantasy, four stars, junior fiction, young adult

Published: April 26 2001
Publisher: Viking Press
Pages: 280
Format: Book
Genre: Junior Fiction/Young Adult Fantasy
★ ★ ★ ★ – 4 Stars

Twelve-year-old Artemis Fowl is a millionaire, a genius—and, above all, a criminal mastermind. But even Artemis doesn’t know what he’s taken on when he kidnaps a fairy, Captain Holly Short of the LEPrecon Unit. These aren’t the fairies of bedtime stories. These fairies are dangerous. Artemid thinks he’s got them just where he wants them, but then they stop playing by the rules.

Having just finished number five in this series I feel we must start gushing about them on here so you can all enjoy them as well (or gush ahead along with my reviews on goodreads). What is interesting when I read this review again how tame and unsure I was, who would know how engrossed and, well, obsessed I’d become. I’d like to think a lot of it was mild shock about the narrative, I had never read anything like it before. The enjoyment I had whilst reading it, and afterwards, was certainly enough to keep me going, and I am definitely glad I did. I had this book referred to me by a friend and she was insistent on its greatness, so with her backing I dived in and I am very thankful. So, this was my first impression upon finishing Artemis Fowl, and if my simple little review doesn’t initially make you instantly add it to your TBR list, I assure you it is worth it, trust me.

When I first finished this book I had no idea what to say about it; I knew I enjoyed it, I knew it was different and well written but I could not find the words to review it. After having had the time to ponder I think I may have myself sorted out.

Artemis Fowl is a 12 year old boy of incredible genius whose sole purpose in this book is to try and regain the family fortune. What makes this book so great is the very nature of it – just simply a 12 year old and his bodyguard taking on the underworld of faeries with wit and an appealing arrogance from someone who does not act his age at all.

There are always books that try and claim that faeries are not the tiny winged creatures living under mushrooms we’ve always believed; instead there are pixies and faeries who are practically human with a deep magic within them. There is nothing wrong with that by any means, but what Colfer does it different again. What he does is make them a civilization that deals with its own issues and problems, has been repressed by humans and are fighting to keep their secrets safe.

Fowl’s interactions with the People (as they’re called), is fantastic. He rarely wavers in his air of self importance and own brilliance which makes him intriguing if not an odd sort of charming. What’s great is that there are no grand corporate plots, evil nemesis’ and no faery political struggle infringing on the human world. None of that, it is just a 12 year old who found a way to get the money he wants, and if it means dragging the magic world into his then so be it. Artemis’ thinking is perfectly sound and he will overcome any impracticality he faces with wit, quick thinking and trickery if need be.

This is only the first novel in a long series but it a great start, certainly one to get you involved and eager to keep going. Colfer changes perspective between the humans and the faeries, and within the faerie recon squad there are great characters that have just as many quirks, flaws and tempers as the best human characters. We are introduced not only to elves but also criminal dwarves, and amusing and terribly sarcastic centaurs, there really is something for everyone.

In all and many unexpected places this story is filled with humour, action, suspense and some really clever writing, not to mention imagination in this intricately constructed underground world. I look forward to continuing the series.

The Book With No Name (#1) by Anonymous

27 Mar 2013 Leave a comment

by Amy in 3 Stars, Bourbon Kid Tags: anonymous, fantasy, paranormal, the bourban kid, three stars

Published: May 28th 2008
Publisher: Michael O’Mara Books
Pages: 379
Format: Book
Genre: Fantasy/Paranormal
★ ★ ★ – 3 Stars

Detective Miles Jensen is called to the lawless town of Santa Mondega to investigate a spate of murders. This would all be quite ordinary in those rough streets, except that Jensen is the Chief Detective of Supernatural Investigations. The breakneck plot centers around a mysterious blue stone — The Eye of the Moon—and the men and women who all want to get their hands on it: a mass murderer with a drinking problem, a hit man who thinks he’s Elvis, and a pair of monks among them. Add in the local crime baron, an amnesiac woman who’s just emerged from a five-year coma, a gypsy fortune teller, and a hapless hotel porter, and the plot thickens fast. Most importantly, how do all these people come to be linked to the strange book with no name? This is the anonymous, ancient book that no one seems to have survived reading. Everyone who has ever read it has been murdered. What can this mean?

The Book With No Name, by Anonymous. The title alone made me pick this book up from a book sale and while it wasn’t the greatest book I have read, it was creative, interesting, and definitely unique.

This is the first book in a series called The Bourbon Kid, and I have to say, while I wouldn’t rush out to get the sequels, if I came across them I would read them. Maybe if I leave it long enough my curiosity will peak and I will track down a sequel and see what happens next, but for now I am enjoying that it was a rather good story.
As soon as the story begins we are introduced to the mystery that is the Bourbon Kid, this prologue starts the novel off as the mystery and foreboding doom this man brings haunts a town. Meanwhile, Detective Miles Jensen has arrived in town to investigate a spate of unusual murders, two monks have left their monastery, a mysterious blue stone begins to cause havoc for all those who wish to possess it, there is also a hitman in town who thinks he is Elvis, an amnesiac woman who has woken from a coma, the boyfriend, and the local crime boss. What could possibly go wrong?

There are a lot of people involved in this narrative, and the author switches character perspectives quite a bit so we get to see the story from everyone’s perspective. I’d say seamlessly but I say with caution. Certainly there are no jarring moments, but you can find yourself reading a new paragraph and become confused, only to realise that you’re following a new character with different thoughts.

These switches occur a lot, and truly not always in a confusing manner, but you do have to pay attention and you will get used to it after awhile. I did find, which was quite clever, that because there were so many characters and storylines to follow, by breaking it up for each character and moment you get these kinds of mini scenes, almost like a collection of short stories which are connected to one another in terms of the bigger picture and have been woven together.

In terms of narrative it was drawn out considerably. Not a lot actually happens for the first 3/4 or so of the book, however you did have a sense that it was all necessary by the time you’ve finished. As you read you kept thinking that the next chapter would be where it all erupted and everything fell into place. This does happen in the end but it is a lot to remember and keep track of while you’re getting there. A lot of it was also character introductions, having so many people involved it does start to fill up pages. And while we never get any real back story or history on a lot of the characters, you are provided with a clear representation of their personality and character that eliminates a need for a history to understand them.

Surprisingly with so many characters in play you do not get lost which I thought was amazing, but you do have more people to become potential suspects in whatever is going on which does your head in if you try and figure it out on your own. Of course everyone basically in this novel is suspicious, as well as guilty of many a thing, but whether they are guilty of what you think they are is where the mystery lies.

I will give credit to the author, I liked the reveal when it came, and I liked that after such a long wait the ending was ideal. I didn’t think that anything had been wrapped up quickly, all the pieces suddenly fell into place and started to make perfect sense, just when you didn’t think there could possibly be a reason and connection for everything. That part was rather impressive.

There is violence in this book, but while describing scenes of death and brutality I didn’t find myself revolted or turned off. I put this down to clever writing and the ability to tell a gruesome scene without having to go in explicit detail which can push it into the grotesque and unreadable. But yes, be warned there is a large amount of violence in the book, and swearing, but swearing goes with the setting of the novel, whereas the violence goes with the narrative.

One way around the amount of violence is the supernatural element, not an overbearing amount, but it is there and, like everything and everyone, it is connected as well. It was worrying in the beginning when the possibility was first brought up because I was unsure how it would fit within the established narrative, but as more information was revealed it turned out alright, and you begin to accept that this is just how it is, and you do not spend a lot of time focused on these supernatural elements. This could be because there are so many extreme moments and aspects of unrealism that the extra dose does not really make that much difference.

Two of my favourite quotes, both obscure and seem rather bizarre, but like the book there are plenty of sentences and aspects of dialogue that feel awkward but not enough to be a real concern.

“He had been shot in the stomach at point blank range by a man toting a double barrel shotgun. It had hurt terribly, and the wound was still bleeding a little, but it would heal. His wounds always healed, although he had come to accept the fact that gunshots did tend to leave a mark.”

“Audrey had no tolerance for mess, but today there was blood everywhere.”

It is these kinds of sentences that make this book charming amongst its faults, quirky lines that seem obvious and almost unworthy of comment, yet it is provided anyway. Some of the phrasing seems a bit awkward but over the course of the book you do not really notice it after awhile, the story gets you in, despite the ambiguity and prolonged revelations.

Finally, we must briefly mention the title and author. I loved that it was mysterious and when I finished the book I loved it even more. I will say no more about it.

Welcome to Santa Mondega, enjoy the ride.

The Magician’s Elephant by Kate DiCamillo

25 Mar 2013 Leave a comment

by Amy in 4 Stars, Birthdays, General, Junior Fiction Tags: birthday, fantasy, four stars, junior fiction, kate dicamillo

Happy Birthday Kate DiCamillo! I discovered Kate DiCamillo a couple of years ago and I have fallen in love with her work and with her words. A couple of DiCamillo’s books have been made into films, the first being Because of Winn-Dixie, the other The Tale of Desperaux; great books, but both of which I offer the ‘Better Than the Movie‘ guy.

Now, I have gushed in the past about DiCamillo’s skills as a writer, I think so much of what she has written has been so eloquently described, beautiful in description, and heart warming in terms of story. One of my first blog posts was a review of her gorgeous story The Tale of Desperaux, which also made it into my Top Five of 2012. DiCamillo once said “I decided a long time ago that I didn’t have to be talented. I just had to be persistent.” I would disagree with her and say that she has got a talent, and for someone that has the ability to write such beauty with such simplistic tools and environments, she manages to make even the smallest aspects of life magical and terribly profound; you only have to read Despereaux or Edward Tulane to see that. Today, in honour of her birthday, I am posting the review of another of her works that I thought was very touching: The Magician’s Elephant.

Published: September 8th 2009
Publisher: Candlewick Press
Pages: 201
Format: Book
Genre: Junior Fiction/Fantasy
★ ★ ★ ★ – 4 Stars

What if? Why not? Could it be?

When a fortuneteller’s tent appears in the market square of the city of Baltese, orphan Peter Augustus Duchene knows the questions that he needs to ask: Does his sister still live? And if so, how can he find her? The fortuneteller’s mysterious answer (an elephant! An elephant will lead him there!) sets off a chain of events so remarkable, so impossible, that you will hardly dare to believe it’s true.

This is the story of Peter Augustus Duchene, a ten year old who went to a fortune teller and made magic happen. Peter’s story is as an orphan in the care of a soldier, looking for answers and wishing for miracles. When miracles begin to happen it is the start of something extraordinary.

The magician’s elephant is unintentional and yet her arrival is one of great joy for Peter, if only he knew what to do about it. The magician himself is an interesting character in the story, he plays such a large role yet he is limited as well. So much of his story is unknown, yet what we see of him is his remorse and his confusion about his actions. I think that for him we do not need a glamorous and detailed back story, for me I think watching him reflect and deal with the aftermath of his magic gave a beautiful insight into who he was as a person.

Behind Peter’s storyline of looking for answers and discovering truths is the strange relationship between the magician and Madam LaVaughn, as well as many others in the city. All the characters in this story have their own sense of magic about them that make the so likeable, even those who do not possibly deserve it at first glance. DiCamillo manages to give them histories and depth in so few words, it really is amazing. There are connections between these characters and you feel connected to each no matter how fleeting they appear.

There are some great quotes in this book, some are very beautiful and touching, but there are funny ones as well, one favourite was “Is the child having some hat related fit?” Little things like that make characters come alive and add that little something extra to a story. It isn’t probably needed, but that what makes them so great.

I thought this book was not as emotionally profound as her previous books like Despereaux or Edward Tulane but it still managed to be heartfelt and beautiful nonetheless. DiCamillo’s books always show that she is such an eloquent write. So many of her books are filled with such simple scenes and characters, yet they are somehow also filled with such depth and beauty. It is superb.

The ending is magical and we are given answers to the questions in the same way we are not given answers. This is ideal because we can take what we can from it ourselves. There is a lot in this book about humanity and how we see the world, but also about kindness to one another. There is also a lot of emotion displayed on the surface of this story that makes it wonderful, it does not always need to go any deeper than that. A very special story that reveals humanity at its best and with its failings I think. Such a small snippet of human life, such a seemingly innocent action, told like it had the importance and magic of the world. After all, the magician “had intended lilies; yes, perhaps. But he had also wanted to perform true magic. He had succeeded.”

As I leave you with these thoughts on this fine Monday morning, I offer you something else. I discovered last night, as I snooped around the interweb until all hours of the morning, that Reading Rockets has posted snippets of an interview with DiCamillo that is really interesting to watch; she talks about becoming a writer, her novels, and she offers advice to new writers. It is always interesting to listen to authors in interviews; some offer the same advice, some recall their hardships into publishing, but somehow, no matter how many versions of ‘to write you must read’ you hear, it is always comforting to get that little bit extra motivation to follow in the footsteps of those writers you adore.

The link to this interview is below, watch it, enjoy it, then ignore the socially imposed unhappiness of Mondays and read something spectacular.

Reading Rockets interview with Kate Dicamillo.

The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy (#1) by Douglas Adams

11 Mar 2013 Leave a comment

by Amy in 5 Stars, Birthdays, General, Science Fiction Tags: birthday, douglas adams, fantasy, five stars, science fiction, the hitchhiker's guide to the galaxy

Happy Birthday Douglas Adams. It is a shame you left us alone in this world so early, but I assure you, you will not be forgotten. In honour of your birthday I would like to look at one of the greatest radio shows, television shows, and book “trilogies” out there: The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. Responsible for so many brilliant quotes; insights into life, the universe, and everything; demonstrating the nature of Vogon poetry (though on no account allow a Vogon to read poetry at you); and the saga that made the world that little bit greater.

Whilst performing in the West End, Douglas Adams was discovered by Python member Graham Chapman and worked with the Python boys on a few sketches for Flying Circus and on The Holy Grail. A few years later Adams also worked with John Lloyd, one of the brains behind the BBC’s brilliant QI. Lloyd helped Adams in part with the radio show in 1978, but it wasn’t until 1979 that the novel version was first published.

This is the first book in the trilogy and created as an adaptation from part of the radio programme. This radio programme turned book was then made into a television show. This television show, based on the book, based on the radio show was then turned into a movie but it wasn’t very good so in my mind the lineage stops at television show. There have also been numerous extensions created from these and a part of Hitchihiker’s manages to find its way into all aspects of life, and deservedly so.

Published: September 27th 1995
Publisher: Del Rey
Pages: 216
Format: Book
Genre: Science Fiction/Fantasy
★ ★ ★ ★ ★ – 5 Stars

Seconds before the Earth is demolished to make way for a galactic freeway, Arthur Dent is plucked off the planet by his friend Ford Prefect, a researcher for the revised edition of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy who, for the last fifteen years, has been posing as an out-of-work actor.

Together this dynamic pair begin a journey through space aided by quotes from The Hitchhiker’s Guide (“A towel is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have”) and a galaxy-full of fellow travelers: Zaphod Beeblebrox–the two-headed, three-armed ex-hippie and totally out-to-lunch president of the galaxy; Trillian, Zaphod’s girlfriend (formally Tricia McMillan), whom Arthur tried to pick up at a cocktail party once upon a time zone; Marvin, a paranoid, brilliant, and chronically depressed robot; Veet Voojagig, a former graduate student who is obsessed with the disappearance of all the ballpoint pens he bought over the years.

I adore the Hitchhiker’s Trilogy. I fell in love with the television show first, then the radio show, then the books. Douglas Adams’ genius shows throughout them all. The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy begins with a house. Not a remarkable house by any means, the only person for whom this house was in any way special was Arthur Dent; a simple man, no more worries than the usual person, except that he wakes to find his home about to be demolished for a bypass. This sets off a series of events as his friend Ford Prefect informs him that in fact the house is the least of his problems since the world is going to be demolished, in twelve minutes…to make way for a hyperspace bypass.

With Ford by his side, Arthur begins an adventure of a highly unusual and sometimes surreal nature, all whilst wearing his dressing gown. After hitchhiking surreptitiously onto a Vogon ship; surviving improbability; using doors that have a cheerful and sunny disposition; meeting the creator of Norway; finding out the Answer to the Great Question of Life, the Universe and Everything; and having a generally wild and exciting time, they decide to have lunch. Why? Because the history of every major Galactic Civilization tends to pass through three distinct and recognisable phases, those of Survival, Inquiry and Sophistication, otherwise known as the How, Why and Where phases. For instance, the first phase is characterised by the question How can we eat? the second by the question Why do we eat? and the third by the question Where shall we have lunch? That’s why.

There are so many things to love about this book. We are introduced a range of unique and peculiar characters such as the President of the Galaxy Zaphod Beeblebrox, Trillion, Marvin, the sperm whale, and a host of others that add to the organised chaos. What is also wonderful is that what is mentioned in this book becomes connected to those in the rest of the trilogy, this is evident through the titles alone.

The Answer is possibly one of the most well known aspects of Hitchiker’s Guide. Stephen Fry, a friend of Adams and a glorious person all round, claims that Adams told him why the answer is what it is. Fry says that “Douglas told me in the strictest confidence exactly why [it is what it is]. The Answer is fascinating, extraordinary and, when you think hard about it, completely obvious. Nonetheless amazing for that. Remarkable really. But sadly I cannot share it with anyone and the secret must go with me to the grave. Pity, because it explains so much beyond the books. It really does explain the secret of life, the universe, and everything.” And if Mr Fry says it is so, and Mr Adams says it is so, then who are we to question?

As I brushed over before there was a movie, no matter how much we try and deny it. I will say that as always the book is better than the movie. Whatever that thing was in 2005 that passed as a movie should be banned. I understand the bias considering I grew up watching the television show and reading the book, and those who loved the book may have thought the same about the television show when it first came out; but that felt a lot closer to the original story than the film did. Maybe not, maybe I just didn’t like it. It’s a complex emotion.

There are a total of five books in the original trilogy, however a sixth was written. And Another Thing… was published on the thirtieth anniversary of the first book’s publication. I have yet to read this book, but I am keen. This final installment was written by Eoin Colfer, of Artemis Fowl fame. My affection for Colfer may or may not impact on my opinion of his addition to the trilogy, it could go either way, but we’ll have to see. I’d like to think a mind like Colfer will do Adams justice, Adams himself was always planning on writing a sixth, and there are few who could replicate it like Adams, but Colfer is a fair starting point.

There are a multitude of glorious quotes that come out of The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, both the book, radio show, and the television series.

– “Many were increasingly of the opinion that they’d all made a big mistake in coming down from the trees in the first place. And some said that even the trees had been a bad move, and that no one should ever have left the oceans.”

– “Time is an illusion. Lunchtime doubly so.”

– “A towel, it says, is about the most massively useful thing an interstellar hitchhiker can have.”

– “The ships hung in the sky in much the same way that bricks don’t.”

– “Space,” it says, “is big. Really big. You just won’t believe how vastly, hugely, mind bogglingly big it is. I mean, you may think it’s a long way down the road to the chemists, but that’s just peanuts to space.”

– “Ford,” he said, “you’re turning into a penguin. Stop it.”

– “For a moment, nothing happened. Then, after a second or so, nothing continued to happen.”

– “Curiously enough, the only thing that went through the mind of the bowl of petunias as it fell was Oh no, not again.”

– “Looking up into the night sky is looking into infinity — distance is incomprehensible and therefore meaningless.”

– “This must be Thursday,’ said Arthur to himself, sinking low over his beer.’I never could get the hang of Thursdays.”

– ” Humans are not proud of their ancestors, and rarely invite them round to dinner.”

I could quote forever, the fact there are an entire trilogy’s worth, plus a radio show, plus a television show, each filled with strange references and quotes just adds to the joy of Adams’ creative mind.

So it is on this day, where we review the obscure, absurd, perfectly reasonable story of The Hitchiker’s Guide to the Galaxy, I wish Douglas Adams a very happy birthday and say he is sadly missed.

If you like you should visit http://www.douglasadams.com/ to find out more about him. There is information there about lectures that are given each year about life, the universe, and everything in honour of Adams. You should also track down the documentary that looks at his life and his work. If you have read this trilogy, or once you have read this trilogy you should branch out, find his other works as he has many more wonderful books out there just waiting to be read.

Embrace yourself in the Douglas Adams wonder upon this day, read something spectacular while you relax on your towel, and most importantly, Don’t Panic.