The Fat Girl by Marilyn Sachs

Published: 1 January 1984 (print)/20 April 2021 (audio) Goodreads badge
Publisher:
Flux/Everand Publications
Pages: 226/4 hrs and 15 mins
Narrator: Trever Goble
Format: Audiobook
Genre: Young Adult
★   ★   ★ – 3 Stars

Jeff Lyons can’t stand Ellen de Luca, the fat girl in his ceramics class. She’s huge, clumsy, can’t throw a pot to save her life, and stares at Jeff all the time. But he’s a “nice guy” and feels terrible when Ellen overhears his hurtful remarks about her. The “crumbs of kindness” he tosses her way soon turn into advice on weight loss, college, clothes, hair . . . and, to everyone’s surprise, good-looking Jeff actually dumps his pretty girlfriend to be with the fat girl Re-creating Ellen is a labor of love, Jeff thinks. But as her pounds melt away, Jeff resents the happy, independent young woman he has unleashed. Where is the gratitude for all he’s done for her? With this darkly ironic take on the classic Pygmalion tale, Marilyn Sachs offers young readers a candid portrayal of what happens when the intoxicating thrill of control is confused with love.

I know we’re meant to hate Jeff.

I know we are meant to hate Jeff.

I have to keep reminding myself we are meant to hate Jeff.

I don’t know why I chose to read this book. Reverse Pygmalion grabbed my attention. Being a short read grabbed my attention. I was curious. But my god, the willpower it takes to push through the hatred is incredible. Kudos to Sachs for writing someone I wanted to punch more than Holden Caulfield.

Jeff is shallow, he is openly shallow. He is unashamedly shallow. I liked seeing Jeff get called out, his mother thinks he’s selfish, he is petulant and a baby. It’s great when he is called out. But the rest is rough.

Jeff is the kind of guy who would be murdered and there’d be no one to miss him.

Sachs goes hard. Jeff is almost hateful in his treatment towards Ellen (or as he frequently refers to her ‘the fat girl’). He is openly hostile and detests her mere existence, even once saying he was turning her “into a human being.”

It is a short read but it is a fascinating study into people like Jeff. People who feel they are superior to those around them and anyone beneath them needs punishing. That when they have their egos bruised even a tiny bit they retaliate, or worse, when they feel they aren’t being appreciated enough, or praised enough for doing the bare minimum, retaliate.

Ellen is the stereotypical overweight person. She eats too much, she’s clumsy, she bumps into things and Sachs really digs it in deep by mentioning Jeff thinks she smells. Everyone other than Ellen is referred to as ‘normal’, Jeff thinks he is a ‘nice guy’ and blames Ellen for him being mean and not making him a good person. It’s incredible.

We see a lot from Ellen’s side, we see her home life and explore her enjoyment of hobbies but we also see her vulnerabilities. Jeff’s mission is to improve Ellen, and she wants his help, she doesn’t want to be the way she is, but she lets Jeff control her. Even when he’s being nice he’s being horrible. His ego grows and he makes Ellen’s achievements about himself.

You see Jeff’s shift at the halfway point. If it took guilt and fear to change him then that’s a start. The great thing is Sachs doesn’t let him off that easy.

It is a fantastic book about making you aware of people like Jeff. If you come across someone like Jeff, run for your life.

Weirdly I didn’t hate the book, but with Jeff behind the wheel I didn’t like reading it. But Sachs points out people’s flaws well, despite the fast pace and the minimal detail and depth. You get a sense of who these characters are and even though the story rushes through days and events, you can see the characters in their elements succinctly.

We have no idea what is happening with other characters further than Jeff’s observations because he is so up himself.

¾ of the way in you see Ellen’s confidence grow, and my own desire for Ellen to drop kick him increased. I needed Jeff to be dealt with. The only shining light in his whole irredeemable life is she scares him into being a decent human being.

The blurb mentions the confusion of control vs love, and Jeff 100% loves being in control, and controlling Ellen. He patronises her, controls how she looks and acts. He dismisses her opinions and thoughts, he is belittling and tells her what she thinks. He ignores her protests, she begs him not to make her do things but he convinces her to do them.

The worst part is Jeff isn’t an idiot, he knows when he mistreats people, but he doesn’t seem to be bothered by it. It’s interesting to see the similarities between Jeff and his family: emotionally manipulative who get their kicks from degrading others.

The good news is you still get to hate Jeff by the end. I was worried, but no. Ellen and another character Norma escape, and we still get to hate Jeff, doomed forever with his mother and their desires to control other people to becoming the people they think they should be.

I was initially going to give this book 1.5 stars, the .5 because Ellen and Norma were the only sensible people in there. But then I remembered you can’t mark a book down because you dislike a character who is designed to be unlikable. So I had another think through and while I disliked Jeff, Sachs tells him in a way we’re supposed to dislike him, supposed to see he is wrong. Not pity him, certainly not. But we see his flaws, his mother’s flaws, see them trapped by their own making. Be grateful to those who escape it. I had to look at the other characters, not through Jeff’s eyes but through their actions.

Writing wise it’s quick, it’s basic detail, jumping quickly through days, but that isn’t a deal breaker. I’m happy with the three. I liked the story it told, but it a different liking the story than anything I have ever read. I hated the story but I liked what happens. I’m going to be confused about this one for a while.

You can purchase The Fat Girl via the following

QBD | Blackwell’s

 Amazon | Amazon Aust | Audible

Repeat by Neal Pollack

Published: 24 March 2015 (print)/24 March 2015 (audio) Goodreads badge
Publisher:
Amazon Lake Union Publishing/Brilliance Audio
Pages: 229/7 hrs and 06 mins
Narrator: Jeff Cummings
Format: Audiobook
Genre: Fiction
★   ★   ★ – 3 Stars

Back on my time loop stories and this is a curious one. So many time loops are single days, usually the worst days of a character’s life but Pollack has brought the story of Brad, and makes him relive the first forty years of his life, resetting the night before his fortieth birthday.

I liked the story, it wasn’t the best time loop story I’d read but at the same time it was captivating, even if it was a rough read. Brad is a terrible person, through cycle after cycle he becomes amazingly an even worse person. Of course there has to be a lesson learnt otherwise I think we’d all reach into the book and strangle Brad on our own. His language and humour is crude, and Pollack drives his character and personality really well in that as understanding as we are, you certainly suffer no sympathy for him.

The fact Brad goes through over “forty, fifty, sixty or seventy five” versions of his forty years, he never learns his lesson. One would think having forty years to work with you’d reflect a bit more, single day loops learn their lessons faster but as Brad ends up hundreds of years old he’s not trying his hardest to escape.

I was fascinated by how long it takes Brad to learn his lesson, and even then I was surprised by the conclusion. I expected Pollack to change more than he did, and even then he made the right choice. Brad changes but at the same time he doesn’t, which given the emotional and crushing journey he’s been on, it might have been the only way.

Pollack drops hints towards the end of the novel about how Brad came to be in his cycle. An inherently cruel time loop given forty years is an incredibly long time. I was curious at how he’d cycle through so many loops with such a long time span but he does a decent job introducing us to a new loop at interesting moments or towards the end and have the story backfill from there.

There are a few inconsistencies but they are forgivable, and as deserving as Brad is for his situation, you do feel sorry for him after a while but never too much. He is someone who feels his problems are the fault of everyone else, and while he knows he plays a part in his own misfortune, I never felt he was grateful for what he had. Especially when he had so many loops to improve the life he had he chooses so many different paths instead it makes you wonder what his commitment is to the family he leaves behind. Brad’s focus is so much on improving his life rather than himself.

There is an unsubtle author self-insert which was interesting, but Pollack included it well narratively speaking. It provides an external perspective on how the world sees Brad after thousands of years. Especially given the capacity for the human brain and the undue stress he places it under. I was glad Pollack address the brain’s capacity to keep memories straight and every version clear given the overlap. That was an interesting approach and one you can’t address in single day loops.

Overall it was an interesting read and a fascinating premise. I can’t say I wasn’t expecting more from having such an extensive loop, but at the same time I was intrigued by the chance to redo your life and how many choices would stay and which would change. Sometimes even with hundreds of chances to redo your life you can’t fully change the character of a person.

You can purchase Repeat via the following

 Booktopia | Amazon | Amazon Aust | Audible

Long Lost Review: Act Cool by Tobly McSmith

Long Lost Reviews is a monthly meme created by Ally over at Ally’s Appraisals which is posted on the second Thursday of every month. The aim is to start tackling your review backlog. Whether it’s an in-depth analysis of how it affected your life, one sentence stating that you only remember the ending, or that you have no recollection of reading the book at all. 

Published: 7 September 2021 (print)/7 September 2021 (audio)
Publisher:
Quill Tree Books/HarperCollins Publishers
Pages: 352/9 hrs and 36 mins
Narrator: Shaan Dasani
Format: Audiobook
Genre: Young Adult
★   ★   ★ – 3 Stars

A trans teen walks the fine line between doing whatever it takes for his acting dream and staying true to himself in this moving, thought-provoking YA novel from the acclaimed author of Stay Gold.

Aspiring actor August Greene just landed a coveted spot at the prestigious School of Performing Arts in New York. There’s only one problem: His conservative parents won’t accept that he’s transgender. And to stay with his aunt in the city, August must promise them he won’t transition.

August is convinced he can play the part his parents want while acting cool and confident in the company of his talented new friends.

But who is August when the lights go down? And where will he turn when the roles start hitting a little too close to home?

It is hard to like August at the start. His show off style and desire to stand out and be noticed is grating but as you get to know him you see where he’s coming from and why he’s chosen to put on these various personas. August’s different personas is a clear way he adapts who he is for the people he is around. It’s also a great way to show even though August thinks he knows who he is, he still hasn’t quite figured it out.

He has great character growth and the different characters he interacts with help bring out different sides of him, as well as shape his character to the reader. We see more of him around different people and see his active decisions in his behaviour, coupled with the knowledge we already have of his past.

Other characters are great, well rounded, and real. Mr Daniels is a tough teacher who wants to make sure August is there for the right reasons, while his aunt is supportive in a way his other family isn’t. The plot is slow, it takes time getting going but it does eventually build to a pivotal moment. The slow reveal about different experiences August has had help you understand him as you go along, and it shifts how you feel towards him too. His goal to reinvent himself balances against his need to belong and his need for security and friendship which McSmith manages well.

This is a great found family novel, and one I didn’t mind being set in a school setting. The unique location of the acting school was a fresh focus of American YA and it is a great exploration of different aspects of hobbies and passions. Dasani does a good job as narrator, August’s voice comes through and it’s easy to get immersed in the story.

It has great representation but it wasn’t an amazing book. I liked it, it had its moments, and it is sure to resonate with someone or expose them to a different kind of story which is all you can hope in a book. There’s a few content warnings like transphobia, dead naming, as well as the prospect of conversion therapy but it’s important to include as it paints a realistic picture of the real world situations people like August go through and is a great mirror up to some people and their opinions.

You can purchase Act Cool via the following

QBD | BooktopiaDymocks

WorderyAngus and Robinson | Blackwell’s

 Fishpond | Amazon | Amazon Aust | Audible

The Sour Grape (#6) by Jory John

Published: 1 November 2022Goodreads badge
Publisher:
HarperCollins
Illustrator: Pete Oswald
Pages: 40
Format: Picture Book
★   ★   ★   ★  – 4 Stars

The Sour Grape holds grudges for every reason under the sun. Lime never returned a scarf they borrowed? Grudge! Orange never called back? Grudge! But when a friend holds a grudge against the Sour Grape without listening to an explanation, the Sour Grape realizes how unfair grudges can be. Could a bunch of forgiveness and compassion be enough to turn a sour grape sweet?

Another course in the Food Group picture books introduces us to Sour Grape. It is a great story, not overly sweet or cute, but it was an interesting and reflective story. One that followed Grape as they told their tale of woe and sorry.

What I enjoy about John’s books is there is often a reason why a character becomes the way they are. This book is no exception as it demonstrate people often have reasons for their behaviour; things happen outside their control, something has happened in their past that can affect their present selves, or sometimes mistakes just happen. What is also wonderful is John makes sure there is a chance to develop as a character and grow by the end of the story. In this case realise so many issues are not a big deal if you communicate and have understanding.

I enjoyed the physical effect of being sour had on Grape, how it affected their outward appearance as well as their interactions with other people. John is great at storytelling and putting messages forward without wedging them in unnaturally, or worse, by having a large neon sign that says “here is the lesson”. The tone of the book is reflective, the message clear, but never unnatural.

I liked the message of this one and it’s is certainly one we could all learn. It’s not telling the reader they can’t be grumpy, or can’t let things annoy them, but it does ask to take things into perspective and have a little understanding. Focus on the positives in the world not the negatives. Let things pass, understand accidents happen, and people will make mistakes. Try not to let it consume your life to your own detriment and others.

John’s food puns on point again as always. I love how they suit the food in question, they aren’t generic and instead have purpose to their story. Oswald also comes through with adorable illustrations of various fruits. A banana walking a dog raises all sorts of questions but in the world of the Food Group gang it’s best not to think about it too much.

You can purchase The Sour Grape via the following

QBD | Booktopia | Blackwell’s

Dymocks | WorderyAngus and Robinson

 Fishpond | Amazon | Amazon Aust

The Legend of Rock, Paper, Scissors by Drew Daywalt

Published: 4th April 2017Goodreads badge
Publisher:
Balzer + Bray
Illustrator: Adam Rex
Pages: 48
Format: Picture Book
★   ★   ★  – 3 Stars

From acclaimed, bestselling creators Drew Daywalt, author of The Day the Crayons Quit and The Day the Crayons Came Home, and Adam Rex, author-illustrator of Frankenstein Makes a Sandwich, comes a laugh-out-loud hilarious picture book about the epic tale of the classic game Rock, Paper, Scissors.

I wouldn’t have thought is possible but Daywalt has intensified the game of scissors, paper, rock. What I never realised is that the stationary supplies and random objects in the world are fighting an intense battle of strength and wit right under our noses. Like Daywalt opened our eyes to the lives of crayons, now we are being shown the underground fight club of objects.

We’re introduced to character Rock who is tired of beating everyone around him and goes out looking for competition. Unfortunately he continues to annihilate the various things he comes across. We discover more of Rock’s character though the intensity of the illustrations. It’s great because it lines up like a wrestling match. There’s big, bold words, close ups of fierce emotions, and full page depictions of Rock’s fighting prowess.

Contrasted immediately as we switch to Paper. Innocent looking Paper who is wide eye and deceptively naïve in appearance. They are also looking for a challenge, escaping their surroundings to seek a worthy battle.

Then there’s Scissors. A worthy fighter against most things with the sharp cut of their fighting style but also seeking a greater opponent outside of the room. Scissors’ design was a curious choice. I didn’t dislike it, but there is something about using the handles as eyes which unsettled me a bit, but I can see Rex’s logic in using them.

I liked that each one of them sought to be defeated. They saw that winning all the time was becoming boring and they wanted a challenge. They wanted to push themselves again.

The three finally meet, battle pants on and ready. The illustrations bring this to life as the battle commences and the only way to describe this is a bit absurd. But absurd in an exaggerated, we know this is ludicrous, yet weirdly entertaining kind of way.

Rex’s illustrations are fascinating. They are intense, full of emotion and fire. He really captures the emotions of the objects, the heat of battle, and the unique personalities of the characters. The illustrations of Rock are particularly glorious. The way Rex has conveyed expressions on a solid rock is so well done. His fierce anger, his strength, and determination come across well.

It is a surreal read. These objects battling for supremacy, wanting to be thwarted, openly battling for…something. Glory I suppose.

It’s weird, it’s strange, it’s baffling certainly but I can’t help but admit that it is a captivating read.

You can purchase The Legend of Rock, Paper, Scissors via the following

QBD | Booktopia | Blackwell’s

Dymocks | Angus and Robinson

 Fishpond | Amazon | Amazon Aust

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